Every struggle phase makes us more strong, makes us more prepared for next challenge and also a fast actionable person.
Just highlighting this part
But every time she got close, something made her uncomfortable again, and she’s too small to understand why she feels this bad, or that it will pass.
Part of me was still listening, waiting for the next cry, or the next movement, for the moment to start all over again.
It waited for the cry, the rejection, the criticism, the next thing to go wrong. The thing didn’t happen. But the part is still standing there with its coat on, not yet convinced it can sit down.
The child is asleep. The offer is approved. The difficult thing is done. And some part of me is still waiting by the door.
The adrenalin and cortisol take time, and continued calm, to exit the body.
Even very good reasoning does not speed the process. Your thoughts sound normal, emotionally healthy.
"How the Body Keeps the Score" by Bessel van der Kolk MD has been on the best seller list for years. The cases he cites are more dramatic than your situation but the physiological process is the same.
Reasoning can change our understanding quite quickly, but the body doesn't react at the same speed, likely because those hormones still need time to move through the system.
And I’ll add that book to my reading list. Thanks.
This really says it all: "Which makes me wonder if I was waiting for the result itself, or for what I hoped the result would prove." and it's my food for thought for the rest of the day
Dan, so true. I've learned, in several of the courses I've watched on evolution, and human psychology (The Great Courses), that our bodies/brains are evolutionary programmed to favor anxiety over relaxing. No wonder we find it hard to let go! Doris
Every struggle phase makes us more strong, makes us more prepared for next challenge and also a fast actionable person.
Just highlighting this part
But every time she got close, something made her uncomfortable again, and she’s too small to understand why she feels this bad, or that it will pass.
Part of me was still listening, waiting for the next cry, or the next movement, for the moment to start all over again.
It waited for the cry, the rejection, the criticism, the next thing to go wrong. The thing didn’t happen. But the part is still standing there with its coat on, not yet convinced it can sit down.
The child is asleep. The offer is approved. The difficult thing is done. And some part of me is still waiting by the door.
Keep writing 💫
Thank you, Ved.
I’m glad that section stood out to you.
Stress produces hormones.
The adrenalin and cortisol take time, and continued calm, to exit the body.
Even very good reasoning does not speed the process. Your thoughts sound normal, emotionally healthy.
"How the Body Keeps the Score" by Bessel van der Kolk MD has been on the best seller list for years. The cases he cites are more dramatic than your situation but the physiological process is the same.
Yeah, thanks.
That feels like a really helpful distinction.
Reasoning can change our understanding quite quickly, but the body doesn't react at the same speed, likely because those hormones still need time to move through the system.
And I’ll add that book to my reading list. Thanks.
This really says it all: "Which makes me wonder if I was waiting for the result itself, or for what I hoped the result would prove." and it's my food for thought for the rest of the day
Thank you. :)
That was the line that inspired the whole piece.
I'm still not sure I know the answer, though.
Dan, so true. I've learned, in several of the courses I've watched on evolution, and human psychology (The Great Courses), that our bodies/brains are evolutionary programmed to favor anxiety over relaxing. No wonder we find it hard to let go! Doris
That would explain a lot :)
The situation had changed, but parts of us were still responding to the old reality.
It’s interesting how much slower trust is than fear.